We need to talk…

I have been slacking so much. Honestly right when I started college it’s like I just dropped off. I had no inspiration for any blog post. Just in terms of the last few months, I have struggled with a few classes, lost a few friends and have come to see who my true friends are, the people who are there through thick and thin. I guess I have just had a big life epiphany when it comes to people in my life. And I am glad that it happened but it is also kind of sad. It sucks seeing the friends I have lost but I have also gained so many friends. With that being said, Do not be afraid to cut negative people out of your life. 

I have also seen that I am incredibly hard on myself. I have let my grades define who I am. It’s like I convince myself that I am going to fail even before I attempt something. I felt as if no matter how hard I try I will never be the perfect version of myself that I want to be. 

I am now trying to learn to catch myself when I get into this mindset. I don’t think it will be easy but it is all about taking that time to step back and reevaluate myself and realize that I am doing fine. I am trying my hardest in school, I am surrounding myself with so many amazing people, I am doing the best I can do. I have to get out of my own head and stop throwing myself a pity party. It is so ridiculous how much time and energy I was spending on telling myself that I am going to fail! I have to stop letting these thoughts weigh me down and stop letting them keep me from being the person I truly am. 

I felt as if the best way for me to end that chapter is to sit down and write this blog. Make it publicly known that I am going to stop trying to tear myself down. I am going to try and balance my life better. I want to go into this next semester empowered and driven. I have to learn to enjoy each moment and opportunity I am given rather than stressing out about what could happen. 

Thank you guys so much for letting me ramble to you. And I really appreciate you taking the time to read this. 

I love you guys to the moon and back!

𝕃𝕠𝕧𝕖, ℍ𝕒𝕪

Finding Me

I have recently felt this overwhelming weight that I could not get rid of. I found my self scrolling through my phone in an aimless attempt to avoid all feelings. It was in this state of unconscious cloudiness that I decided I am so sick of feeling this way. I’m not sure why or exactly how I came to the conclusion but I knew my Texas trip with my boyfriend, Henry was my chance to completely escape this weight.
As our trip came closer, I continued to find myself stuck in thoughts of wondering why I felt the way I did. I’m aware that we as humans tend to ebb and flow in and out of our many aspirations and inspirations, but I still couldn’t shake the feeling this was something of my own doing. Why did it suddenly feel like the pace of my life had sped up after going through every single day with the same overwhelming schedule and avoiding all human interaction. It was as if I was living every day over and over again, unhappy, lonely, but yet not having the motivation to change it. I’d sift through my to-do list of things still not completed as my anxiety began to rise, and my motivation began to decrease.
I’m not a stranger to this feeling – it’s poked it’s head in and out of my door many times throughout the past few years. I feel as if I’m going to war with myself over nothing.
There will always be things to-do, people to worry about, and a job to go to.  In a lot of ways, I tend to attempt to trick myself by believing that if I ignore my feelings and anxiety that I will suddenly feel the weight lift off my chest again.  It’s only ever been from running away from my responsibilities that I’ve lost the biggest sense of connection to who I am and where I want to be going.
Instead, it is in the humidity of Texas that I came to a couple conclusions and committed to a few life decisions that is slowly helping me find who I am and what I deserve. Henry’s mom told me that when the kids would swim in the ocean she would tell them “don’t fight the current just float.” Even though this was her advice for her kids when they were little and swimming in the ocean; I felt the need to apply this to my own life. It’s about accepting that life has a way of feeling hectic and chaotic, but in zoning our focus on the things that matter most we can stay afloat.  Deciding to always take care of ourselves and find what makes us feel most balanced.  Deciding to break from our chains and let go of our toxic people and thoughts that pull us down.  Daring to find things that make us happy right where we are while we work and do our best to get to where we are going.  Doing things that make us forget to check our phones and surrounding ourselves with people who make us laugh till we cry.  To taste new foods and try new things and recognize what we deserve.
Choosing to count our memories. Refusing to waste any of our precious time comparing our paths to others and instead trusting God and His timing for our lives while finding freedom in the joy that comes meeting new people and sending encouragement in every direction. By choosing to do our best with everything that presents itself to us and not think about any other outcomes.
It’s in making these decisions to let go and just live that we begin to understand that life isn’t supposed to make sense to any of us. It’s about learning to stop fighting the waves and instead float and enjoy the waves and soak up the sun.
It’s a wild ride, but I think that’s the point.

Thanks for reading my rant of me trying to figure out who I am.

As always, with love

xo – hay
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Week of prom prepping!!

 

 

 

These are pictures from our proms last year❤

So I will be the first to admit that I am incredibly extra when it comes to any big event. This prom will be the 9th dance I’ve been to. I almost always make a schedule that looks exactly like this in order to prep myself for a big event. So I’m going to walk you all through how I spend the week getting ready for a big event.

Monday: time to start taming your acne

-use anti-redness eye drops to reduce any redness or any inflammation that come with acne!

-If I’m breaking out more than usual, I make a powdered aspirin mask! I’ll leave a link to the recipe I use.

Recipe

Tuesday: bring out your inner glow

-This is my go to recipe when I need to brighten my face up! This lemon honey skin scrub leaves my face feeling absolutely amazing.

Recipe

-I also use a peeling mask! You can totally just go buy one from the store, but I am a health nut when it comes to what I’m putting on my skin so I usually make my own! The mask from this recipe smells a little funny, but it works so so well. And you know the charcoal masks that everyone seems to be doing that hurts when you peel it off. Well… this one hurts super bad, so if you have any peach fuzz you probably won’t have any after this! So you also don’t have to worry about getting rid of peach fuzz, you kill two birds with one stone(LOL).

Recipe

Wednesday: tame your brows!

-Do NOT wait until the day before prom to wax your brows because you don’t know how long your skin will stay irritated. Yes, I am speaking from experience.

-Also use today and find a good brow gel that will keep your brows in place throughout all of your prom festivities

Thursday: just pamper yourself

prom is supposed to be fun so don’t forget to take a day to just relax!

-Today I usually go get my nails done! One of my favorite things to do when I’m getting ready for a big event.

(you’re about to see how extra I am)

– I usually take an extra long bath. Diffuse stress away oil. Use a lavender bath bomb.

Friday: goodbye hairy legs 

-So I usually take another bath (because I’m extra) and exfoliate with a coffee scrub

-I go buy a brand new razor or wax strips. If I shave any earlier then today there is a good chance I’m not going to have smooth legs on prom day 😂

– I also self tan this day. I normally use a tanning bed (super unhealthy I know) but we just moved so I don’t have access to my tanning bed.

coffee scrub recipe:

Mix together

• 1 tablespoon of coffee ground

• 1 tablespoon of sugar

• 1 tablespoon of coconut oil or olive oil

What I do every day:

-I whiten my teeth with my smilescience kit: use the code “Haylee2” for 90% off of your kit

-I also apply argon oil to my ends every day this week just to help with the dryness

Prom tip:

-Invest in a good antiperspirant or deodorant

– I always use lipsense for special events like this. Lipsense is a smudge proof lipstick! I wore bright red lipstick with my white dress last year and I wasn’t even worried about it. The lipstick lasted the entire day: pictures, dinner, and dancing.

I’ll be following along with this schedule this week on my Instagram story so follow hayleejacobs_ if you want to prep for prom with me!

Date Night

 

 

 

We both are about to graduate, we have jobs, and his soccer season just started so needless to say we have a hard to squeezing in date nights. Whenever we do have a date night it’s usually staying in ordering pizza and watching a movie. So tonight was a little different for us but it was so much fun.

Our first stop was dinner! We went to Noodles&company, I got my usual Thai chicken soup and Henry got Penne Rosa and Wisconsin mac n cheese.

Next stop… DUCK DONUTS!! I’ve been craving a duck donut for 3 months now and I have told Henry every single day (no joke). Henry gets the maple bacon donut and my favorite donut is covered in vanilla icing, Oreos and hot fudge🤤.

Then our final destination was the Regal. We saw ‘I can only Imagine’ and it was SO GOOD. Henry and I have been together for almost 2 years and we have only been to the movies together 4 times since we started dating. But I am so glad we went tonight.

It was so so so nice to just escape reality and have an amazing date night with my sweet man.❤️